why you absolutely need to watch "revenge body with khloe kardashian"

Image Source: complex.com

I've never been one to tout the Kardashians as role models, nor involve myself in their drama-ridden "reality."

But, since Khloe took control of her health, I've found her, well ... inspiring. Revenge Body is no exception.

Kelsey Miller at refinery29 was quick to condemn Khloe, those on her new show, and those who watch her new show. Miller — who is not, mind you, a health and fitness expert — is the mind behind "The Anti-Diet Project" and "Rational Fitness."

Both programs seem to advocate utilizing happiness as an effective means of getting healthy. They're basically the Joel Osteens of the health and fitness world. Miller makes some good points with these programs — killing yourself in the gym every day will only make you miserable; depriving yourself of every tasty treat will do more harm than good — but she never tells the whole story. She claims that taking a long, meditative walk counts as being active. I admit that those are excellent for overall health and are far better than sitting on the couch for a Netflix binge, but long walks do not a fitness regimen make.

When you want to see results, you have to push yourself. You have to get out of your comfort zone. That doesn't mean train for a marathon if you hate running. That just means challenge yourself. Get your heart rate above 140. Load the bar a little more (safely). When you've gone as hard as you think you can go, go a little harder.

That, to me, is the point of Revenge Body. In the first episode, we met Will and Stephanie. Both were tested, and both proved to themselves that they were capable of so much more than they expected. Both were on the show to get revenge, against an ex and against friends, respectively, and both eventually realized that those people's opinions don't matter.

Each person found strength within themselves to get healthy, and that's exactly what they did. They spent three months focusing on nothing but themselves, and they were better off for it.

Those of us who struggle with our weight often put others' needs before our own. We take care of everyone else and neglect ourselves. We overeat. We don't exercise. We eat our feelings. Then, we realize how much weight we've gained, feel guilty, and eat even more.

Revenge Body serves as a reminder that your health is about you, and no one else. If you want to get healthy, you have to make the decision to put yourself first. Take care of your needs. You need to make time to exercise. You need to eat whole, healthy foods. You need to get enough sleep, and you need to take care of your mind through plenty of rest and relaxation.

To Miller's points, no, this is not a groundbreaking new health and fitness show that will give you the tools you need to lose weight. It's a Kardashian show on E!, for Pete's sake.

But, it is a show that can provide you that extra bit of motivation you need to get off the couch. It's a show that will remind you that your social and mental problems won't be fixed simply with weight loss. It's a show that will prove that those people you're getting "revenge" against by getting hot are just toxic and completely undeserving of your time.

If you're like me and find motivation in seeing other people succeed in their weight loss and health goals, then Revenge Body is a great show for you. If you're looking for tips and tricks and secrets to weight loss: look elsewhere. Little time is actually spent on the importance of healthy food choices and great workout regimens.

Regardless of whether you choose to watch it, remember that your health is about you. If some jerk inspires you to get healthy to get Revenge, then let that be your motivation. But don't let that be your purpose. Your purpose is to get healthy for you. To show yourself what you can do. To ensure you have a longer life, more energy, and greater happiness over all.


If you are looking for tips and tricks to help you with your weight loss/health journey, these are some of my personal favorite resources (be sure to let me know yours in the comments!):

• Whole30 Diet: http://whole30.com
• Stupid Easy Paleo Recipes: http://stupideasypaleo.com
• Self Magazine: http://www.self.com
• Greatist Health & Fitness Blog: http://greatist.com

And, you can follow my personal fitness journey on Instagram: @laurencathleenfitness

my experience with a cult

I wasn't entirely sure what I was getting myself into. I'd been thinking about it for months; hearing other people's experiences and enlightenments tempted me, but still, I was hesitant.

I was confident I wouldn't fit in. I would be an overweight, lumbering CrossFitter and weightlifter, wading into a sea of skinny white basics.

But, if I ever wanted to try SoulCycle, now was my opportunity.

I've been a member of an online workout support group-of-sorts for about a year. I join in the online discussions, "like" the other members' photos and videos on Facebook and Instagram, and offer encouragement if someone seems to need it. But, whenever the topic of the monthly meet-up/workout is broached, I fall silent.

These women had become my sisters, my confidantes and my support group, but I was terrified to workout with them. What if I'm the biggest one there? What if I can't keep up? What if, once again, I feel like the fat one out?

But I knew SoulCycle was dark and arranged in lines, so people were predisposed to not see you. The leader of the online group had managed to swing a free class for us, which rounded up the utter annihilation of my excuses.

I stepped through the glass doors, from the harshly lit, hot and humid Houston into the welcoming, cheerful - and somehow also serene - foyer. I was terrified, immediately surrounded by beautiful, fit people. But, they managed to put me at ease with smiles that offered comfort and inclusion.

I signed in, received my shoes, and headed down the white hall - passing the bright yellow Big Ass balloons that indicated a party was afoot - to the co-ed locker room. (Adjacent to the separate men's and women's bathrooms and showers. Phew.)

Amid the beautiful women (no really. Like, stupid beautiful.) in the, again, all-white, locker room, my fresh comfort and confidence began to waver. The Kool-Aid offered to me by the receptionist's smile was wearing off. But, my cup was quickly refilled by both the veterans and the newbies who helped me find my locker and showed me how to operate it.

With my belongings in stow and my feet in borrowed shoes, I clacked, water bottle and towel in hand, back down the hall to the, thankfully sparsely populated, studio. I found my bike, situated my water bottle and climbed to the seat.

Oh no. 

The seat was too high, too far back from the handlebars. I tried to get off but the foreign shoe had clipped itself into the pedal, refusing to release me from the cult's grasp. Panicked, I looked around frantically. Again, I was greeted with a smile. "Having trouble?" asked the friendly cyclist pedaling away caddy-corner to me. I managed a nod. "Don't worry; they'll set you right up."

Her hand shot in the air. "It's happening!"

Immediately a friendly face with a yellow SOUL tee was by my side, guiding my foot out of the locked position and showing me how to adjust the bike's three components: the seat height, the handlebar height, and the distance between the two. She helped me up and taught me how to clip in (on purpose).

"Comfortable?"

No. I don't think I belong here. I'm not a SoulCycle kind of girl. I've never been to a spin class. I'm sitting on a pole. And my clipped shoes make me feel like there's no escape.

"Mhmm."

The class filled up quickly and soon I was surrounded and being greeted by a voice that was trying to be soothing but was clearly meant to yell.

We began, guided by our leader, Catie, calmly saying "left, right, left." According to her, with everyone on the same foot, the energy becomes palpable. Soon, the class became one. Our feet moved in unison left, right, left faster and faster. Did I have no control over my own body? My legs spun of their own accord, matching, spin for spin, those to my right and left. Left, right, left. Before I knew it, I was tapping it back.

Twenty minutes into the class I felt death approach. My mouth was filled with cotton balls, my Dri-Fit tank drenched. I reached for my now half-empty water bottle, and watched it fall from my fingers to the ground in slow motion. Oh no. 

Disoriented, I went to grab my towel and it, too, slipped from my grasp. I tried to unclip my shoes to pick up my manna, and I couldn't figure it out. I was trapped on the bike from hell with no water and no towel. I'm going to die here.

With zero regard to my dire situation, Catie persisted. Left, right, left. So, I pressed on. Again, my body matched the tempo of those around me. We pumped together, up and down. Swayed together, left and right. Spun together, faster and faster.

"How's my back row feeling?" Catie demanded.

A voice sounding suspiciously like my own responded, "Woooo!" Was that? Noooo. Was that me? Did I just woo?

I did. I woo-ed. I was - dare I say it - having fun. Mind you, a torturous, killer-cardio-driven kind of fun, but fun nonetheless. My thighs no longer felt like they were on fire. (Truthfully, they didn't quite feel much like anything.) And I finally felt ... home.

That's it. I was home. There was peace here. Comfort. No judgement, no side-eyes. No one was looking at me differently for being big. I didn't even feel big here. I felt new, sure. Not as great at cardio, duh. But I didn't feel big.

In CrossFit, my size is both an asset and a hindrance. During the strength portions, I can lift on par with much more experienced women. But, during the intense workouts, I founder. My knees give, my form suffers and I steadily lose tempo with those around me. In both portions, though, I'm constantly aware of how big I am.

Not so at SoulCycle. At SoulCycle, I almost felt like I was one of them. Not a skinny white basic, but a person who enjoyed community and health. A person who wanted to better herself physically, mentally, emotionally, and, yes, spiritually, in one workout. A person who cares about her body but not its size.

Now that someone has helped me unclip my shoes (again), the endorphins have worn off, and I'm well-hydrated, do I feel like it was the soul-changing, spiritually awakening workout of legend? Not this time. But, I did just sign up for three more classes.

unmentionable product reviews

After having seen the Dove Dry Spray commercials, I have to admit that I was pretty excited about the aerosol deodorant.

I know. I'm easily excited.

The team at Influenster sent me the dry spray to try out. (Technically, I tried out the Degree Dry Spray. But, since both brands live under the Unilever house ... tomato tomatoe.)

The shower curtain is from Pottery Barn three years ago. But, Target has a similar option for less than half of what I paid.

I decided to try it out for two weeks to really give it a fair chance at shaping my opinions. I only needed one day.

*Disclaimer: The rest of this blog post is pretty TMI. So ... you know ... come back later if you don't like hearing about armpits.

Now, I've never been a heavy underarm sweater, so I really didn't consider myself to be a good test audience for this. But, when my underarms felt damp by noon every day, I realized that the normal activity of my glands didn't matter too much.

Let's completely ignore the fact that you're spraying heavily scented chemicals near your face/in your breathing supply with every application, and focus solely on the fact that wearing this was honestly worse than the days I forget to apply deodorant at all. (Don't judge me. It happens to you, too.) I hate to think of the people working out within three feet of me on CrossFit days. Those poor noses will never be the same.

So, packaging, you claim it's a 48 hour antiperspirant? I call BS. All-in-all, I'll be "sticking" with my normal solid. (Geddit? Because solid deo is a stick?)

Now, one product that is quickly becoming a permanent fixture on my bathroom shelf is the Serious Serum.

My girl Erica at Zanella's (I've mentioned them before.) asked me to try out this "Ingrown Hair Eliminator" because I always always always have redness. Not just right after a wax. Always.

I've been using the serum religiously for about two months (applying a pea-sized amount to the "areas" after my daily shower), and my redness/bumps have definitely become less frequent and much less noticeable, annoying, and, well, itchy.

Honest point-of-interest: Though the overwhelming redness and bumps have decreased significantly, I have had a few large-ish ingrown hair problem spots, which I haven't really seen since high school. But, I'm holding out hope that continuing to use this regularly will help with those, as well.

About the serum:

The best AHA Ingrown Hair eliminator and Skin Exfoliant you’ll ever use. Seriously. Serious Serum is the perfect blend of 6% lactic acid, 3% glycolic acid, and 1% salicylic acid, which will leave your skin silky smooth and fabulous anywhere you apply it.

Serious Serum was developed for post waxing use to alleviate ingrown hairs, blast breakouts, and minimize redness. However, we happily discovered that the combination of facial grade AHAs and green tea, aloe vera, and chamomile work perfectly to smooth bumpy, rough skin everywhere!

Bonus points that it's even good for sensitive skin! If you have issues with ingrown hairs and bumps/redness, ensuring your skin never looks as good as those damn bikini models', give the serum a go. You can pick it up at Zanella's after your next torture session ... I mean wax.

Have you tried out any new products that you love or hate? Do us a favor and let us know in the comments!

currently coveting: skin care

Do you ever wish you could forgo paying bills just to get that really light moisturizer, or that awesome body scrub?

Yeah. Me, too.

These are the top five skin care products I'm craving this week:

1. Clairsonic Mia Skin Cleansing System

Duh. Who doesn't want this? Can't you just imagine all of the dirt in your pores screaming and running when it sees the beautiful spinning brush of doom headed it's way?

It removes 30x the age-expediting nastiness that hand-washing does. I just imagine feeling so ... clean. Like after a trip to the dentist ... but for your face.

Plus it comes in teal, my faves.

2. Body Shop Ximenia & Salt Scrub

I got my first Brazilian a few weeks ago (TMI? ... that's a story in itself ... or, a whole 'nother ball of wax ... haha). My beautiful, wonderful, kind esthetician told me I needed to exfoliate, a scrub being one of the options. I'm pretty sure that's an acceptable excuse to get this. She's basically a doctor.

What's better: it's made from Fair Trade products, meaning The Body Shop sources it ethically, paying the women who produce the ingredients a fair wage, and even pays them a premium to invest in community projects.

3. Sephora Favorites Summer Crushes Collection

Basically, this is all you need for summer. The totes adorbs (blegh. I hate abbrevs) travel bag carries 11 essential summer products for your face, hair, body, lips and feels, all from some of Sephora's best-selling brands.

Some of the stuff in there is so beautifully, fancifully girly, I don't even know what it is. Like the divine oil. But I know I need it.

It also has tanning mousse and a mitt, surf spray, vanilla coconut fragrance, a restoring mask, SPF lip balm, sun screen, special shaving stuff, and something from DERMAdoctor called "Shrinking Beauty." I don't know what that is, either. But, I love DERMAdoctor and am a huge fan of anything named "shrinking."

4. The Body Shop Aloe Calming Kit

As cool as I pretend to be, I can be a pretty anxious person. So, one of my favorite things to do after a rough day at work or a trip to Wal-Mart (let's be honest: that'll make anyone a basket-case), one of my favorite things to do is relax with a soothing lavendar bath or aloe face mask.

Enter the calming kit, which includes face wash, day cream (to prevent you from letting Wal-Mart get to you), night cream, and a mask (there it is). And, as mentioned above, The Body Shop has fair trade policies with the aloe vera farmers in Guatemala. TBS is able to source completely organic, preservative-free aloe vera gel for its products, so you can completely relax, knowing you're helping the environment and Guatemalan farmers ... and getting in some good aloe time along the way.

5. CLINIQUE Dramatically Different Moisturizing Lotion+

There's just something about CLINIQUE that makes me feel more feminine ... more ... like a woman. Like I'm about to have a soul-bonding moment with Aretha. (OK, so, maybe I already did that.)

I had a sample of this lotion and I absolutely loved it. It feels light, without being too watery, and has a pleasant, but not overwhelming scent. I never want my face to smell overwhelming. It makes me think of people who get the meat sweats ... Lord, don't ever let me get meat sweats.

I digress.

I think I may personally need their moisturizing gel, though, as my skin tends to be a bit oilier, especially during the Louisiana summer. So, dry combination to very dry skin, this one's for you. We oily girls get the gel (that almost sounds counter-intuitive, huh?).